What are you focused on?
I was thinking about people who I admire and had an introspective moment about the power of vision and focus. One of the things that many of the people I admire have in common is that they found their focus early in their lives and careers. What was I doing during my early years? I was turning over stone after stone (and some stones multiple times) looking for something that would catapult me into financial stability and happiness. I wasn’t looking for a get rich quick scheme. Rather, I was operating on two different planes. On one level, I was laying tracks for what could’ve been a path forward. But that path seemed so hard that I thought was it likely the wrong path. Although I would later come to understand that every road has steep and unexpected curves, I went searching for paths that offered fast traction and emotional safety. Because I didn’t find that, I kept considering new career and business options because I thought scratch-your-head difficulties meant that I was on the wrong track.
I wasn’t afraid of hard work. I was afraid of doing the wrong work. What if I invested myself into a career that I hated from the get-go and never grew to love it? What if I worked on personal goals and failed? So, I drove down the divided highway of my life, toggling between focusing on survival and hunting for fast traction for a long time. Then, one day, it hit me: I was where I was because the clearest part of my unfocused vision focused on survival. I’d risen to my highest and clearest vision for myself. Did you hear what I said? I was stunned to realize I’d risen to my highest and clearest vision for myself without experiencing a capstone moment! (queue Deborah Cox’s, “how did you get here?”)
I was wondering why I hadn’t accomplished some of the other things that were on my list when, all along, those other things were akin to appreciating another woman’s outfit. You see it, you appreciate it, but you don’t have to have it and you don’t necessarily go buy it. You just think, “That’s nice.” I had noticed the outfits of larger goals, but I hadn’t committed to anything except survival. Or think of it this way, when you have a clear vision for how you want to look when you’re going somewhere, nobody in the store can help you find it and the salesperson will get on your nerves if they offer too much help because you know you’ll know it when you see it and you don’t want the salesperson’s help because it’s only interfering with your hunt. You will drive to 10 different stores and spend countless hours online searching for what’s in your mind’s eye. We’ll go for broke when we see it and we’ll get mad about having to choose something lesser!! We wanted what we wanted, and we knew it would’ve been baaaaaaaaaaaaad, if we could’ve found it!
Like that outfit, whatever you focus on is what your behavior will be oriented toward.
If you are not focused, you may be busy, but the question is, where are you going? Are you there yet?